Pump Out NYE
Anna is visiting Long Beach, and I am glad to have the company. Life is always more interesting with guests at the house. We’ve been hanging around the Belmont Shore; enjoying Quinn’s and Open Sesame. We didn’t have huge plans for New Year’s Eve, but I was looking forward to a relaxed and fun night. I did have fun, but I didn’t get there without an emergency visit from the plumber.
The plan was K.C. Branaghans in Naples. Its a good neighborhood pub, and they were offering a Champagne toast at midnight. I started the evening grilling a few steaks on the deck. Dinner also included turkey soup, pot stickers, sun dried tomato bread with cheese and a few drinks. After I finished with a shower, things got dirty.
My downstairs neighbor came an knocked on my door. Raw sewage and drainage water was billowing from the side of the house. We grabbed some flash lights and looked at the mess. It was gushing from a drain into the front yard. It was like a poop swamp. My neighbor said their bathtub was filled like a portapot at Bonnaroo. Just what a New Year’s Party needed—a massive craptastic intervention.
Everyone ceased to use the running water. Both Anna and Teresa hadn’t showered. Myself and my neighbor contacted our landlord. Luckily, we did reach her, but she didn’t think a plumber would be available until at least the AM. Nasty. We found a hotel in Seal Beach, but decided to wait for about an hour. By this time, it was 930pm, and I was afraid NYE was going to be pooped.
Amazingly, the landlord came through in the clutch. An emergency plumber arrived a bit after 10pm. We’d started playing some music; trying to make a party out of the poopy. It was an interesting mashup to hear Bob Marley and a industrial strength snake doing its thing. The plumber was working all the way downstairs, but you could feel the movement in the pipes. It was an interesting scene.
Around 1030pm, we got the all clear notice. It was safe to use running water, so we canceled the hotel. The ladies quickly cleaned up which is more than I can say for the front yard. Anyway, we made it down to Naples by 11pm. It was time to party! They handed out plenty of party favors, and we made tons of noise. Its funny how children’s toys make you act like a child, almost immediately. We danced to Prince and Michael Jackson. One girl could dance like Michael’s backups; it was awesome. At 10 seconds to twelve, the entire bar commenced the countdown. 3, 2, 1 Happy New Year! Champagne toast and I got to kiss a pretty girl!
All feces aside, I had a great NYE. Considering last year, when I went to bed early in depressing Portland, this year was a party like 1999. How could you anticipate a plumbing failure? It was an integral part of our NYE party. At least, it kept things interesting. I thoroughly enjoyed Branaghans; its always a great time. Of course, its wonderful to have Anna visiting. We’ll have to see what other dirty situations we get ourselves into the rest of the weekend.
Comments
What, no photos of the poop?
Ben... Sorry for the delay, but here is a picture. You're looking at the discharge pipe on the side of the house. From this pipe gushed gallons of dirty water from the bathroom and kitchen. This picture was taken today. As you can see, no one has thought to cleanup the mess.
